Parenting ABCs
If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do matters much.
—Jackie Kennedy Onassis
Always Be Consistent. Children thrive on routine and structure. They need to know what is expected of them as well as the possible consequence. This consistency and being present as the primary caretaker (physically and emotionally) increases the likelihood that the child will become securely attached.
Attachment style includes how we react and interact with others emotionally and impacts our pattern of behaviors. There are four main attachment styles – secure, insecure-avoidant, insecure ambivalent, and disorganized.
Being a parent is the single most important role of our lives. While it is challenging and at times frustrating, it can also be the most rewarding and joyful experience of our lives. Unfortunately, the majority of us are not taught how to parent. We will either model our parents or react to them. However, we need to figure out what works for us personally as well as our children. Understanding your child’s temperament is also critical.
There are three common temperaments for infants and children—easy (40%), slow to warm (15%), and difficult (10%). 30% do not fall into any of these categories.
Below are resources that can be helpful in navigating this journey:
Brain Rules for Baby: How to Raise a Smart and Happy Child from Zero to Five by John Medina
How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen by Joanna Farber and Julie King
The Whole Brain Child: Twelve Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids Workbook by Dr. Laura Markham
1-2-3 Magic: 3-Step Discipline for Calm, Effective & Happy Parenting by Thomas W. Phelan, PhD
The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child by Alan E. Kazdin, PhD
The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children by Ross W. Greene, PhD
The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them by Elaine Aron, PhD